There is nothing more annoying or frustrating than the feeling you get when you can’t find something that you know isn’t really lost. It’s not really missing; it’s just not in the place you expected it to be. It could be something as common as a nail file or a gardening trowel. Then again, it could much more complex if it happens to be one of your offspring.
The most important principle to remember when trying to find lost things is to not eliminate any possibilities. Sure, there is no explanation for why your missing single sock should end up in the vegetable crisper of your refrigerator, but that’s no reason to discount the crisper as a suspect.
Statistics show that most lost items are found within 15 feet from where they were first noticed as missing. Some of the most popular of these are remotes, cell phones and car keys. All these have a nasty habit of slipping between the cushions of the sofa and disappearing down the black hole of living room comfort. Another common disappearing act involves shopping lists, which will travel to galaxies far away and long ago just to thwart you from any kind of grocery shopping efficiency.
Visualization can be an important tool in retrieving items that you seem to have lost. Close your eyes and imagine that the object of your search lies in the palm of your hand. This tactic doesn’t work as well if you are missing your 150-pound Rottweiler guard dog. It also doesn’t help if you start to question your sanity. If you start doubting whether you ever actually had a ride-on mower, your chances of recovery are slim.
It is almost inevitable that when you do find that missing thing, it will mysteriously appear in a place you had already checked at least 10 times. It is for this reason that you must repeatedly keep checking and rechecking the same places over and over again. It may not make any sense to you, but the pixies follow their own rules of logic.
It doesn’t hurt to carry your own sleuth bag chock full of finding equipment. You should include a magnifying glass, flashlight, magnet, broom handle and coat hanger. If you feel you need night vision goggles, body armour and a taser, then you have probably been watching too much Netflix. Apps such as Google Earth and GPS Tracker are excellent tools for narrowing down your search coordinates, but you are likely to find yourself getting sidetracked by interactive gaming programs and cat videos.
Quite often, you may find that you forget what you are looking for. Other times you find things that you forgot you had lost. You may discover that when you finally do find that missing object, it looks nothing like the description you gave to friends and family who were helping you locate it. This once happened to my mother. She once lost her car in the parking lot of a large shopping centre. Eventually, she called the police to report that her car had been stolen. As the officer was filling out the report, the parking lot emptied out since the stores were all closing. Suddenly my mother gave a shout of glee as she spotted her vehicle. The trouble was that she was pointing at a car that was a different make, colour, model and had plates not at all similar to the one she had just reported. She had forgotten that earlier in the day she had taken her car in for servicing and had been given a courtesy loaner while hers was being repaired. Needless to say, the cop was not amused.
If you hope to find anything you may have lost or misplaced, you’re going to need a search strategy. Retracing your steps from when you first noticed that something was missing sounds like a good idea, but chances are you will have forgotten all the twists and turns you may or may not have taken in the meantime.
If you want to be successful in your search, you need to follow a strict step-by-step regimen.
Step 1: Return to the place you last remember seeing your lost thing.
Step 2: Allow yourself to get sidetracked by all the dust and lint all over the place.
Step 3: Dig out the vacuum cleaner and start removing dust and dirt.
Step 4: Stop and change vacuum cleaner bag because more dust is being blown into the room than is being sucked up.
Step 5: Begin your search for spare vacuum cleaner bags.
Step 6: Take all the clutter off the shelves and floor and place in cardboard box.
Step 7: Find cardboard box.
Step 8: Repeat steps 1 through 7 at second last place you remember seeing lost object.
Are you ready for a trial run? Let’s say you can’t find your blue-handled slip nose pliers. Where did you last use them? Think, now. Were you fixing the cold water faucet leaking into the bathtub? No, you never got around to that chore. Were you using them to pull a cedar sliver out of your big toe because you couldn’t remember where you last left your good tweezers? That might sound a little far-fetched, but remember not to eliminate any possibilities.
Nobody asked me, but you’ll be much better off if you accept the fact that things get lost and disappear and they don’t all return to you. If you try some of the retrieval exercises mentioned above, you may get lucky enough to be reunited with your missing stuff. On the other hand, your train of thought may already have been derailed or has left the station without you. Don’t panic. Don’t call 9-1-1. Just breathe. If desperate, you can pray to Saint Anthony of Padua, the patron saint of lost things, but don’t be surprised if something is lost in translation.
Or you can start trying to find something completely unrelated because the best way to find something is to look for something else.